A Look Back

I'm not one to make New Year's resolutions, probably for several reasons.  Therefore, I will not be listing any such goals in this post.

I just read a post by Jennifer at Getting Down With Jesus that has me thinking a little.  Instead of looking back at 2009 and lamenting over resolutions she did not...well, resolve...she did the opposite.  She stepped back and reflected on things that happened that she did not resolve to do.  Her year carried many unplanned and trying events.  But in hindsight, she can see the grace of God and His provision through it all.  If you follow her posts for very long, you can see how she finds Him at work in whatever she faces.

So here is my own list of things that happened in 2009 that I did not plan - or sometimes even desire - to be a part of, but have been blessed through.

• Blogging.  I never thought I would become a blogger, and the creation of my site happened rather suddenly.  A few months prior I had started writing down thoughts as they came to me and saved them on my computer (which later crashed and erased my meager collection).  After a few conversations with a couple of friends who had their own writing agendas, I, too, joined the online world of words.  And wow, have I seen God multiply blessings in places I never imagined!  My followers are few, but they include friends and acquaintances that I never expected.  I have seen God bless through words I have written, and He has opened new doors of ministry with and through these people whom I have connected with.
• Music.  My part in my church's music ministry has grown in ways I didn't see coming.  I used to barely show up Sunday mornings to strum along with a few songs.  Now I "lead" during Sunday morning services.  And Tuesday evenings are spent with a handful of friends in a room off the sanctuary, gathered together for a simple acoustic set of praise songs to our Father.
• Prayer.  Through pain and lonliness the Father has drawn me closer to Himself.  He provided a long morning commute to spend with Him, and while I continue to fail miserably at doing this well, it has become a chunk of my day that I would sorely miss if it were not there.  He has also led me to a weekly commitment of serving others by interceding for them.
• Change in heart.  I covet the few hours I get to spend at home in the evenings.  Yet God has helped (and continues to help, for this is an extended process) me to step outside of myself and focus on others.  He has opened my heart a little wider to create a desire for the poor and the lost, and to serve.  I have been trying to get organized enough to learn to make blankets so I can give them away to those without this winter...or spring...or later, depending on when I actually get that far.  He has also shown me (and has to continually remind me) the blessing in having the job I do, because it allows me to give more financially to people locally and around the world who otherwise have nothing.

Each category above is a treasure chest full of blessings that simply cannot be shared in only a few paragraphs.  And the only way I have any of them is because of the road He has brought me down during this season in my life.  It has been a hard road, one laden with thorns and branches and barriers and unexpected turns.  I can't say it's one I care to travel again, and I don't even know that I can say I am grateful for it.  There are other roads I would have much rather taken.  But I know that He is faithful to do a good work in me and carry it on to completion.  And I can say that I am glad for the blessings I have now and would not trade them for any earthly gain.

I don't like to sound conceited, and I realize writing about things I have done and received can look a little big-headed.  But I wrote them anyway because it is God who has done these works in my life, not me.  If I did not intentionally reflect on them, I might miss the blessings altogether.